My Random Ramblings

I just wanna blog something that is worth remembering. Something that I wanna be reminded by the time comes I am ready to reveal what I really feel, or maybe it would just be revealed naturally.

2 years ago, I met this guy whom I almost cursed with all my life. I was just got so stocked with my past that I totally closed my heart and my eyes from the possibilities of falling in love again.

Then I met this "Mr. Courageous" guy. He did everything. He made me feel special, he just did immeasurable efforts that ONLY me could not appreciate. I remember those times when I had to hid myself whenever I get to bump with him in the hallways just because I was trying to avoid him. Those times when I had to deny my voice over the phone whenever I got to talk to him Those times whenever I got to refuse to his invites to movie or dinner dates just because I just simply didn't like him, or maybe I was inlove with someone else. Those times when I pretended to got no load just because I never wanted to text him back. Those days!!!... The days I wish I could say sorry. =(

If I have to recall, I know I had hurt him too without even meaning it. Sometimes, it hurts to know that we just can't teach our hearts who it would be beating for.

Until one day, I prayed. I prayed that I would fall for him. I prayed that I would feel the same way, just to end all the sufferings I had. Surprisingly, there was one moment in my life when I just felt happy with his presence. I don't really know if it was love but it just so happened that he became a person who made me happy and made my heart skipped a bit. Everything was so perfect He loved me and I liked it. Til the day came when I have to pay the pain I had caused him before the happy stories we had. maybe I just have to learn my lesson. maybe I just have to feel how it was to be love and be in pain in return. Maybe it was my turn to chase him, and him to push me away. It all happened when he told me he was inlove with someone else, the time when I was learning to love him back. It was so painful that I just could not find a word to describe it well.

Fastforward to the moving on process. Today, we are both in the stage of forgiving and forgetting. What is done, is done and the past is past. So here we are in a let's start all over phase and live with no expectations. I know somehow, that we both grew up and learned our lessons. Truly, we both got hurt and personally, I have gained so much from it.

....pag gusto ka at ayaw mo, sabihin mo na. Wag mo nang hayaang dumating ang araw na ikaw nmn ang paasahin.
.... Pag nagsorry na at alam mo nmng totoo, patawarin mo na at kalimutan na ang lahat. Tandaan mong, ikaw din nmn nagkakamali.
...May mga taong gusto ka pero ayaw mo, at gusto mo pero ayaw ka. Tanggapin nlng. Wag manakit. Malay mo, bumaliktad ang mundo, gaya ko. ;)

Our story has actually not ended yet. Yes it hasn't...

(to be continued)