What My Heart Says...

Sometimes, we have a lot to say but we just can't. We are afraid to share too much information that we just need to keep it to ourselves, leaving us wanting to burst out. I know I used to blog things out. Travel diaries, random ramblings and ranting about anything. Then I came to a point where living is much more important than writing. It was more like, goodbye blogsite, hello world!

Too many things happened to me after several years when I last write about a blog. I cannot even remember what was it about. I got a boyfriend, got engaged, and got married. I travelled many places and I did not write anything about them like I used to do. I told myself that I will only write when I am motivated to do so.

Today, I wanted to burst my heart into writing. This is not about anything. I have nothing in my mind.   I used to write when I am at the peak of my emotion. But honestly today, my mind is empty.

I just thought that my emotional quotient dropped down to zero that even the littlest thing I have to write because I can't bear not doing so.

Today, I just miss my family. I am upset of not going to make it to my sister's wedding and I am sad that I am not going to see them anytime soon. I know I am too blessed to rant and complain about my life. No, actually I am not complaining. I am just saying. You don't have to read this out because I am warning you, this is just another boring post.

Actually, I have bumped into someone who has so insecurities in her life. Someone who sees life in a very negative way. Complains about everything. I could not hear anything good about her. She rants about her pain and all that I could hear is that she feels she's the most doomed person in the world. I used to tell her that it's all on her mind but it didn't change a thing. Suddenly, it came to a point that I am so into her problems already. I actually am praying for her. I don't see anything wrong in her life. She has a complete family and many people love her. She has a good job and all that.

Then I came on thinking, why do people think this way?
I believe my life has never been perfect. I have been through so many insecurities in my life before. I thought I was not good enough. I thought I was not pretty enough and good for nothing. But then, the time I learned to love myself, I realized that there's so much about life to live for.

Life is not just about me. I learned a lot.
I learned to be happy for others' success.. Instead of comparing them to my failures.
I learned to listen to other people...Instead of just talking about myself.
I learned to love those people who feels unloved..instead of trying to seek for people to love me back.

I wanted to help her.
I wanted her to realize these things.
I wanted to comfort her, i just don't know how.
I wanted her to realize the things I had
I wanted her and other people who are in despair to know that we live not to focus on how we can outweigh other people. But instead, we live to lift other people up when they are down.

I wish
I pray
for people. to learn not just to love themselves, but for other people and LIFE.